Walk

I went for my customary walk at lunch today, book in hand, lost in readerly bliss.

I’ve just made four assertions. First: that I routinely go for a walk at lunchtime. Second, that I went on such a walk this afternoon. Third, that I was carrying a book, and reading that book, as I walked. Fourth, that I was enjoying it immensely.

Three of these assertions are true. One of them is not.

A bus driver got shot early this morning, standing on the steps of his bus. I’m fairly certain he wasn’t hatching any plans for world dominion at the time, or contemplating any crimes, or plotting to murder anyone. He was probably thinking dull, undangerous things. Man it’s cold out here. Wonder if winter’s going to be bad this year. Things like that. Maybe he was reading a book, or a newspaper, or a magazine. He certainly wasn’t doing anything wrong. By all accounts, he was a good man. Someone shot him anyway.

What does that mean? Does it mean anything? It’s been said often that the most terrifying thing about this sniper is that he picks his victims randomly; there’s no apparent pattern in who he chooses to kill. I agree, but I think there’s more to it than that. I think that the key to this man’s success in scaring the shit out of just about everybody within a hundred mile radious is his uncanny similarity to a much larger force. We’ll call it Fate, for lack of a better term. Or maybe the Universe. Or Chance. Whatever. It snuffs out thousands more lives than he does every day.

Here’s the problem: the Universe is a random senseless place where random senseless things happen to innocent people who don’t deserve it. We protect ourselves as much as possible from the truth of this through ignorance, denial, religion, defiance, or some mixture of all four. We concoct elaborate rituals to explain, justify, mourn the crazy things that the Universe does to us. But ultimately we know that we have no control. The sniper is a disciple of chaos, and that’s why he’s so scary.

I went for my customary walk at lunch today, book in hand.